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Showing posts with label firsts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label firsts. Show all posts
23 November 2011
FTLOB Makeover!!
10 August 2011
The Banana Democratic Republic
India as we know it,through various visions of Orientalism is the land of temples,yoga,chai,snake-charmers and food-good,good food and not merely curry.I don't know what variation is meted out to poor souls out of the country,but I can assure you our cuisine,like our Kamasutra, seeks to please and not terrorize.They also do not come with a complementary package of simultanous heart and butt-burn.Remember this the next time you're being duped.
India,however, is also home to pot-holes,sweaty armpits on buses and banana peels.The latter is about to play an important part in the narrative.
Much as I love the fair (or caramel) maiden called My Country,I often reject such tawdry practices as much disregard for a panda "wide open" with Use Me stamped across it.I believe the problem lies herein-the use of an animal or an ugly plastic imitation of The Wobbly Man as trash cans.The nation could be better trained in the use of a dustbin if plastic cutouts of womenfolk (barring Aishwarya Rai- we never speak too ill of the too plastic or the too pregnant) were used instead.The use of the words "Use Me" would then retain sufficient didactic characteristics and cheap pun veiled or unveiled as chosen to be seen by the "users".No,this is not a feminist rant.Hell,I'm not even one-this is just my injured dignity talking.
I love the rains.They refresh, rejuvenate and considerably bring down the god-damn heat.I also like bananas.But rains,a careless banana eater and me does not a godly communion make.Turns out people have not been fabricating comic relief out of slipping on banana peels all this time.It happens.Happens to us all.Happened to me today.Could happen to you too.The absurdity still hasn't hit me or I'd be crippled with laughter and unable to write this post-but here I am in careful and weirded out contemplation.
It's a known fact in the world where blogs are offline and on hold while unsuspecting people partake in their mundane existence that I am a klutz.I could fall down standing up and doing nothing.I would trip atleast once out on the road and risk loosing all my teeth.Today was no different-except perhaps the usual sequence manifested itself into a magnified form.
Sweta gets off bus,takes a step and WHAM!face down,butt up in the mud.Right in front of my college.For a horrible moment I expected a goofy T.V douche to pop-out and say "SMILE!You're on *oh GOD NO* camera!"I picked up what was left of my ragged dignity and my cellphone and scurried into the campus-still in shock-still unsure whether too laugh or nurse my throbbing knee.
It happens to the best of us except not the best laugh comes out of it.Sorry,Injured Dignity on the line again.
Who am i kidding?
It's hilarious!
P.s:I'm fine.Ow my knee.
India,however, is also home to pot-holes,sweaty armpits on buses and banana peels.The latter is about to play an important part in the narrative.
Much as I love the fair (or caramel) maiden called My Country,I often reject such tawdry practices as much disregard for a panda "wide open" with Use Me stamped across it.I believe the problem lies herein-the use of an animal or an ugly plastic imitation of The Wobbly Man as trash cans.The nation could be better trained in the use of a dustbin if plastic cutouts of womenfolk (barring Aishwarya Rai- we never speak too ill of the too plastic or the too pregnant) were used instead.The use of the words "Use Me" would then retain sufficient didactic characteristics and cheap pun veiled or unveiled as chosen to be seen by the "users".No,this is not a feminist rant.Hell,I'm not even one-this is just my injured dignity talking.
I love the rains.They refresh, rejuvenate and considerably bring down the god-damn heat.I also like bananas.But rains,a careless banana eater and me does not a godly communion make.Turns out people have not been fabricating comic relief out of slipping on banana peels all this time.It happens.Happens to us all.Happened to me today.Could happen to you too.The absurdity still hasn't hit me or I'd be crippled with laughter and unable to write this post-but here I am in careful and weirded out contemplation.
It's a known fact in the world where blogs are offline and on hold while unsuspecting people partake in their mundane existence that I am a klutz.I could fall down standing up and doing nothing.I would trip atleast once out on the road and risk loosing all my teeth.Today was no different-except perhaps the usual sequence manifested itself into a magnified form.
Sweta gets off bus,takes a step and WHAM!face down,butt up in the mud.Right in front of my college.For a horrible moment I expected a goofy T.V douche to pop-out and say "SMILE!You're on *oh GOD NO* camera!"I picked up what was left of my ragged dignity and my cellphone and scurried into the campus-still in shock-still unsure whether too laugh or nurse my throbbing knee.
It happens to the best of us except not the best laugh comes out of it.Sorry,Injured Dignity on the line again.
Who am i kidding?
It's hilarious!
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